Malena

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Malena
File:Malena.jpg
Background information
Origin Canada
Instruments flute with her vagina
Years active 2002-present
Notable instruments
flute with her vagina

Malena is a former pornstar and controversial singer who sings extremely provocative lyrics over catchy dance-pop music. She originated in 2002 but didn't receive commercial success until 2005. She has a repertoire of hits, both in pornography and music.

Early Life[edit | edit source]

Not much is known about Malena's early life, other than the fact that her body underwent a condition called precocious puberty. Her sexual organs were fully developed by the age of 7. Her father molested her and she became pregnant. She later gave birh to all five members of Twist. This is why Twist are retarded, because they were born as a result of inbreeding and precocious puberty.

Career[edit | edit source]

Malena was initially an adult film star, starring in over 1900 movies before her music career. She is one of the most successful adult actresses in the world, and is known for daring to perform outrageous sex acts.

In 2002, Malena attempted to launch a musical career. She released the top ten single "Nasty Girl" and her debut album Are You Wild Enough?. Unfortunately, none of the other singles would repeat the same success, nor would her second album I'd Do a Cockney!. She returned to the pornography industry in 2003 after her short-lived music career, before releasing her final film Highway in 2005. It was followed by a Best Of Malena compilation.

Malena attempted a musical career again in 2005. This time, however, she was met with an incredible amount of success. Her 'comeback' single "BJ Queen" entered the top three. Two months later, "I Just Had To Say It" reached #2. The album, The Original Queen Of Nasty, also performed beyond expectations.

Perhaps two of Malena's biggest songs, Make My Flaps Slap/He Came On The Frame, reached #1 when they were released in August 2005. The single went on to sell over 300,000 copies, becoming Malena's best selling ever. Two more singles were released from the album, both entering the top five.

In July 2006, Malena released the first song from her fourth album No Swallowing Allowed. The song, "Steady Fucking", was tamer than some of her previous songs and became Malena's second #1 single. The album repeated the success.

Only two more singles were released from the album. The first, "Fukkk My Kkkunt" was another top three hit. The second, a remix of the fan favourite "Cancer Boy", was released as a download-only single.

In 2007, Malena relocated to Zimbabwe. She states her reasoning for relocating to the impoverished African nation was due to the fact that she could own multiple mansions and pieces of land very cheaply. She has not announced what she intends to do with all these properties.

Malena release her first single from her untitled fifth studio album, "D.V.D.A." on January 7th, 2008. It was previously scheduled for October 2007 but was cancelled and delayed without explaination.

On March 24, 2008, Malena announced the release of a new single called "Rookie Pussy", to be released physically on May 5th. She described the song as a "crunk/ghetto tune" and with some very controversial subject matter. A new album titled "Funhouse of Depravity" was also announced for a May 5th release. The title was then changed to "Innocent Until Proven Filthy" with a release date of May 12th.

Discography[edit | edit source]

Albums[edit | edit source]

Year Single title Position
2002 Are You Wild Enough? #11
I'd Do a Cockney! #24
2005 The Original Queen Of Nasty #2
2006 No Swallowing Allowed #1
2008 Innocent Until Proven Filthy #4

Compilations[edit | edit source]

Year Single title Position
2003 Best of Malena Budget release
2010 Greatest Tits #5

Singles[edit | edit source]

Year Single title Position Album
2002 Nasty Girl #9
Are You Wild Enough?
Shooter #12
Freak Like Me #28
Spank Me #17
I'd Rather Do a Cockney!
Horny For Your Love #18
2005 BJ Queen #3
The Original Queen Of Nasty
I Just Had To Say It #2
Make My Flaps Slap/He Came On The Frame #1
You Suck! EP #2
2006 Bitch/Beat You Up #5
Steady Fucking #1
No Swallowing Allowed
Fukkk My Kkkunt #3
2007 Cancer Boy [Hairless Chemo Patient Remix] download only
2008 D.V.D.A. #4
Innocent Until Proven Filthy
Rookie Pussy #7
2010 I Don't Do Anal #5
Greatest Tits

Guest appearances[edit | edit source]

Year Song title With Album
2005 Those Lips Putanovska Extravaganza
Stormy Weather Sasha Riley My Generation
Next Best Pornstar Melvin Be
2006 She Don't Fuck You Latavia The Coronation